The New Negativity Group

What started on Thursday afternoon and contin­ued after the Friday­ prayer, according to our informants, is confirmed to be a big plot against the university. Led by an ex vice dean, 2 ex Engineering department heads, 2 ex Business heads and 3 other faculty, the group was seen exchanging information in a Hookah Parlor in Kuwait City, far from AUM influence and close to AUM enemy territory. 

The group had a total of two very constructive meetings where many ideas were discussed, includ­ing setting the univ­ersity on fire before they get fired themselves. Wa­tch out, AUM! Boost security measures in the parking lot and around the gates, especially now with busy waiting lines around 5 pm. Rumor has it they are also planning an anti-AUM campaign during this admission time. The idea is very simple – te­ll the truth about AUM, but this time to potential students and their families and in Arabic. 

In parallel, the ever expanding ex AUM team are also gatheri­ng with big big plan­s. AUM staff number is down with a total of 25 employees for the past 3 weeks. Well-done on fi­ring those people! If in doubt about why this was done, refer to AUM News Weekly’s message in celeration of International Weed Day. There still are some weeds left in the Business College and in LAD to take care of but their time will come.

One thing is sure. No matter how many people are let go, AUM will never get Soccer Daddy. He told you already! He is in Canada and all his informers at AUM are safe and in good health. Some of them just got promoted! Thank you, idiots!

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Author: Shenou

I have a job.

1 thought on “The New Negativity Group”

  1. Who in LAD? Do you know? Do you have access to the firing list? Is it true that the people who were fired were asked to name faculty and to blame them for leaking information, sharing confidential information and for gossip? There is talk that AUM is installing a new surveillance system to track people’s conversations.

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